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Mother, I'm coming home.

 

(Feel free to laugh at my misfortune (that's not all that unfortunate if you take away my dramatic qualities))

Oh. Man. So, here I am in the Paris airport after an 8-hour flight. What does that mean? I'm half-way there, man, half-way there. I am tired, in pain, kind of cold and alone. Yes. Alone. Ryan and my mother are god knows where and although I am at the moment writing this from the airport I'll be posting it from Syria because I don't even have the internet! I mean, sure, I can buy Wi-Fi, but I will not stand for such an atrocity! Paying for slow airport internet? Whatever. Anyway, right now at home it's 3:18 A.M. and way past my bedtime but I can't sleep because I have to deal with this jet-lag sass before it gets the best of me. However, this is not easy because as some of you may know, I need sleep. Yes, I know, everyone needs sleep but... I NEED IT MORE THAN EVERYONE ELSE. I fall asleep about four times a day and can't last past 10:30.... Wow, I'm rambling. I'm going crazy here. WHEN CAN I LEAVE THIS PLACE?! Oh my.

Okay, some highlights of my travels thus far...
1.Taking pictures of strangers and an unsuspecting Ryan in this weird airport
2.Watching my mom watch It's Complicated on the plane (a fantastic movie, I'd recommend it to any appreciative, mature audience)
3.Yeah okay, the movies were pretty good, but the headphones sucked! They're essentially pieces of plastic throwing noise in the general direction of your ear... not headphones.
4.Airport bathrooms. They rock.
5.Missing an entire night of sleep
6.My FACE was falling off all over the place on the plane and my moisturizer was NOT helping
7.Airplane dinner of sauteed shrimp and rice. What a delicacy.
8.Having both my legs fall asleep while seated for a grand total of 8 hours
9.There was a loud, obnoxious priest, and he was pissin' me off with his not-funny humor

More later.... if I survive this traveling business.

My mother just offered me airport salmon. Airport salmon. Oh my god.